My Brillant Children

As I have mentioned before, I am teaching a section of Formation of the Christian Mind (freshman orientation) and as part of the course, the students were required to take a personality test. So, I took the test so I could share the results with my class. I was an even split between two personalities: Choleric, the extrovert, the doer, the optimist and Melancholy, the introvert, the thinker, the pessimist. I remember taking this same test when I was in college, and the professor commenting that he had never seen that combination before...so good, I'm an oddball. I knew that. Call it bipolar, blame it on the fact that I am a Gemini (although I put absolutely no stock in horoscopes), but apparently I have a split personality.

The test has long lists of attributes for each personality, most of which I would agree with...It even has a section which lists attributes as a parent. This is what it says about my parenting style...

The Choleric as a Parent:
Exerts sound leadership
Establishes goals
Motivates family to action
Knows the right answer
Organizes household

The Melancholy as a Parent:
Sets high standards
Wants everything done right
Keeps home in good order
Picks up after children
Sacrifices own will for others
Encourages scholarship and talent

All of which, I would agree with...I expect a lot of my kids. And they always rise to my expectations, and exceed them.

Case in Point: When Rhian comes home from school and sits down to do her homework; this is what often happens...
There is Rhian, diligently working math problems, and Elizabeth who insists upon doing homework as well, and Jacklyn, who just does everything her older sisters do. They look so academic, don't they?
Rhian really likes math. She is really good at math. However, recently she asked me if her penmanship was good enough on her math homework or if she needed to redo it...Obviously, I can take the setting high standards thing to an extreme.

And then there is Elizabeth, whom insists that she must do homework too. Therefore, I bought a book of preschool worksheets that help her practice forming letters and numbers, and learn to recognize shapes, colors and patterns. She works at least six pages every night. She begs to do them. She loves to do them.

So I am raising classic overachievers...At least that's what I thought before I took the personality test. Now, I am somewhat worried.

The test also lists weaknesses as a parent for each personality. Here is what it says about me:

The Choleric as a Parent:
Tend to Overdominate
Gives answers too quickly
Impatient with poor performance
Won't let children relax
May send them into depression

The Melancholy as a Parent:
Puts goals beyond reach
May discourage children
May be too meticulous
Becomes martyr
Sulks over disagreements
Puts guilt upon children

Isn't that horrible? Now I am terrified. Should I lighten up? Should I hug them and reassure them more? Should I allow them to run free like the wind? No more homework kids! No more chores! Play! Play! Get Dirty!

She looks depressed. Before I thought she was just concentrating, but now maybe she is depressed looking. Does she look depressed to you? Overdominated? Discouraged? Tense?
Look--now this one has to be crying out for help...and she's young enough to be helped! Help! Help! My mother is going to send me into overachiever depression!

Okay, so maybe I am being a little melodramatic. But seriously, this is one of the major reasons I don't homeschool. My children would be warped. Not they are not already. What eight-year-old do you know who offers to redo homework? What four-year-old wants to do worksheets?

Dear Lord, please let my children be normal. Please don't let them be eggheads.

Melodrama aside--maybe I am just raising overachievers.

(Note: Due to the high number of concerned readers who gave me very sweet advice about not being so hard on myself...I felt it necessary to write a disclaimer about this particular blog...I was being sarcastic--I am a very sarcastic person, remember? While I do agree that I am somewhat hard on my kids--please note all of the other blogs where my children at least seem to be happy and well adjusted...Thank you, though, to all those who were concerned about me!)